what's it like being gay

[sextutorial2]

what's it like

[Drakocxjo]

you just kinda see them and go "damn, hot" and then you get way too into a very specific mushroom species

[Jazzy Vidalia]

Nice name, but it sounds like the tutorial could use some updating ;)

Actually, that's a good question that is unique to every person who's experienced queerness. For me it's a mixed bag. Growing up, I had family that would have been supportive—I think, but I really didn't want to find out especially since I wasn't gay, per-se but transgender. And lesbian. It is something I knew I was since about 6 or so but I never really had the means to express it properly. Those kind of ideas such as you could become a woman weren't exactly commonly floating around in the US South in the 1980s and 90s, and even if I could properly express it I am sure I would have been ridiculed. I kinda had this instinctual knowledge it was dangerous and the few times I did try to express it I was either not taken seriously or I was abused for doing so.

What I did mostly experience was homophobia from people who assumed I was gay and it was mostly those kind of attitudes that ultimately led me to move from the South because it was hard for me to find work because most people thought I was weird or a creep and moving up was difficult.

I was considering coming out back in 2009 or so, but seeing how Youtubers and weird online boards started going after transgender people really put me back in the closet for almost another ten years and it wasn't really until 2019 that I decided to emerge as Jazzy.

Coming out up here wasn't that bad, tbh. Most people in the PNW (in Eugene at least) are really nice about it. Sure, I get a rude comment every now and then, a strange look, etc but I get far more complements about how good I look and that's actually very empowering.

The question I want answered is how did my bullies in school know that I was a lesbian before I did!

[Jazzy Vidalia]

Also I cosign what @Drakocxjo said. We're basically like crows.

"Hey, want to see my collection of shiny things."
"OMG I LOVE SHINY THINGS"
Then spend the next three hours infodumping about shiny things except it's like Deltarune or Pathfinder 5E.

[Wester_Hare]

Jazzy Vidalia wrote:

The question I want answered is how did my bullies in school know that I
was a lesbian before I did!

If these articles/studies on autism are any indication people are a lot more perceptive of deviation from expected norms than anyone assumes. All the little unexpected reactions give away that something about you is "queer" no matter how deep you bury it.
As Benny New Vegas says:
"From where you're kneeling it must seem like an 18-carat run of bad luck.
Truth is... the game was rigged from the start."

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5286449/

https://www.spectrumnews.org/opinion/q- ... ing-clear/

https://www.spectrumnews.org/features/d ... le-autism/

[sextutorial2]

Jazzy Vidalia wrote:

Nice name, but it sounds like the tutorial could use some updating ;)

it's not gaysextutorial2 tho

[Drakocxjo]

sextutorial2 wrote:

it's not gaysextutorial2 tho

It coulda, nay, SHOULDA been

[Jazzy Vidalia]

sextutorial2 wrote:

it's not gaysextutorial2 tho

It could be if you wanted.

@ Wester: socially diagnosed as autistically gay.

[Wester_Hare]

Jazzy Vidalia wrote:

@ Wester: socially diagnosed as autistically gay.

One of my proudest moments in any workplace was the time I found out my coworkers were running a betting pool on if I was gay or not.

(This was about a year before my egg cracked)

[BELROSE]

Wester_Hare wrote:

One of my proudest moments in any workplace was the time I found out my coworkers
were running a betting pool on if I was gay or not.

a colleague of mine once asked one of my friends, "so is [deadname] gay or not??" because she could not place the vibe. i was sleeping with said friend at the time, which made it funnier. my friend wasn't quite as amused